Exodus 22:16-17 reveals several key things about the true Biblical stance on premarital sex. For one thing, even relatively casual but consensual sex between unmarried and unengaged people is not automatically a sin if there is subsequent commitment, and certainly not one deserving of death like adultery (Deuteronomy 22:22) or bestiality (Exodus 22:19). However, the text does say they should get married (casual sex with no commitment whatsoever is what is condemned), not that the most genuine form of marriage has anything to do with the social construct of a legal document or ceremony. It adds that the father and by logical extension the mother, since both are equals before God on the basis of gender (Genesis 1:26-27, Deuteronomy 21:18-20, and so on), of the woman and also by extension the man can refuse the formal marriage.
The couple should get legally married or at least married in the non-legal sense of mutual commitment--unless there is reason to not move forward with deepening or continuing the relationship with or without parental approval. Even in Exodus 22:16-17, marriage is already not a universally prescribed outcome. If the parents object, the unmarried, unengaged man and woman do not have to be legally married according to these verses, and what would be the legitimate basis for them not doing this? At the very least, the same things that would legitimize dissolving a decades-long marriage, such as abuse and neglect of any kind (Exodus 21:9-11) or sexual immorality (Matthew 19:9), which itself includes abuse such as rape (a capital sin according to Deuteronomy 22:25-27, so a marriage with rape should end one way or another), would justify the couple not remaining together.
The parents could recognize these problems or at least the probability of them and insist that the marriage is a terrible idea. Moreover, one would not have to be a parent to realize these problems are present. There is no moral duty or personal benefit to racing towards a marriage that will only imprison one or bother parties whether or not sex has taken place. Of course, sex should be reserved for genuine commitment, but that commitment is never presented in the Bible as something that supercedes all other concerns, like safety in marriage.
While still addressing how sex needs to be in the context of mutual commitment and how causal sex sometimes needs to lead to marriage, Exodus 22:16-17 on its own already gives possible reasons why a couple should not pursue lifelong commitment even if they has premarital sex. The other criteria I mentioned would follow from this or be closely related. No matter what expressions of commitment have already occurred, up to regular sex, no one is Biblically obligated to keep heading towards a future where they are abused or neglected in any way independent of whether they have an unfaithful partner.
Sex before a legal marriage and the reaction to this sex would ideally push someone towards a relationship of lasting commitment unless there is reason to break that relationship apart, but just as a legal marriage can be rightly annulled (Exodus 21:9-11, Deuteronomy 24:1-4), this kind of extra-legal marriage or engagement before God can be legitimately dissolved before God in the same manner. The Christian God is far more encouraging of divorce than many have been told without actually reading and analyzing the Bible free of assumptions. A lifeless, abusive marriage, including on a psychological level, is a tragedy to the point that a victim is free to leave before any legal affirmation or any further damage, whichever is applicable, is done.
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