Handling Depression

Depression is a vicious monster, a deep sadness that goes beyond the sadness resulting from what some would call a bad day.  It can be mild or severe and can afflict numerous people quite differently.  How should Christians with depression handle their condition?  I am writing this post largely out of concern for the large number of those around me who suffer from some sort of depression (at church, my college, and perhaps in my family).  Several years ago I did not understand depression as I do now; now I have seen just how destructive and cruel it can be in the lives of those around me.  This monstrous mental shackle can make simple tasks seem exhausting and can sap the vitality and will to live from those who suffer from it.  Side effects or direct results of it can include anything from a sense of aimless frustration to apathy or an inability to experience emotional pleasure (to a small or great extent).

Telling depressed people to just "do" simple things they may have trouble with isn't helpful.  Actually, it's rather asinine.  Just as someone cannot live easily with a damaged limb, someone cannot live easily with mental illness or mental pain.  Imagine yourself having a natural state of sadness that makes you rarely want to socialize outside of a small group of friends or see the public or visit stores to obtain things you need to survive.  Now imagine someone telling you to just "get over it".  I hope you see how this poor, pitifully inadequate advice does not help emotionally or mentally.

Remember that if Christianity is true, meaning and human value remain fixed and outside of our feelings--meaning our mental health does not determine if God loves us and does not distort our moral status before God.  Having depression is not sinful and depression does not mean that you aren't loving God enough.  Simply trying to will the deeper aches of this condition away will not help at all, and loving God will not necessarily alleviate the pain.  Any pastor or Christian who says otherwise does not understand the concept of depression or its multiple faces.  People who try to blame someone else's depression on his or her lack of love for or commitment to God may be well-meaning, but they are useless.

While I do not at all think I have suffered anywhere near as severely as some I know, I have experienced periods of mild to deep depression.  Although depression could easily be coupled with an existential crisis, mine seems to be more existential than not, meaning mine is not so much a depression I've always carried within me but one that developed during my intense examination of philosophy and theology (epistemological limitations and the things they prevent me from knowing terrify me).  But some things have helped me.  Things that have enabled me to cope with this are friends, entertainment, and prayer.  I find that I am far less depressed during times where I regularly hang out with my handful of close friends.  Since we are social beings (Genesis 2:18) and I am a very extroverted person, this does not surprise me at all.  I also enjoy entertainment (music, movies, and video games), and sometimes relaxing and watching or playing something makes me have fun and get excited.  Despite these things, I realize that depression can manifest itself in notably distinct ways in the lives of different individuals and that different strategies may be needed.  I am simply sharing things that have helped me.

There are some who may never truly be capable of being happy, just content or "not terrible" at best.  I may not be able to recommend anything that actually makes them experience happiness itself.  Indeed, no prescription or stage of personal growth may ultimately ensure that they can be happy.  But I can remind them that it does not follow from them feeling unhappy, perhaps even worthless, that they have no significance and value.  I can listen to them, be there for them, pray for them, encourage them, and do things with them.

To those who are Christians, I emphasize the potential joy that can come about from relating to God and other humans made in his image.  I also encourage you to not treat others with depression like some have: don't feed them lies about their relationship with God or tell them things about their own psychology that aren't true.  To those who are not Christians--or not even theists at all, I remind you that, whether or not you suffer from depression, if God does not exist then there can be no meaning.  Again, feelings of joy or emptiness and sadness do not mean that reality does or does not have meaning.  Since the only way that there can be meaning is if God exists (not that the existence of a deity in itself logically necessitates that meaning also exists), it is hopelessly futile to seek for meaning outside of God.  No one can find what does not exist.

As I have said before, "I do not love life itself, I only love a handful of things in life" [1].  I know what it is like to be depressed, though not as depressed as some.  I know how human existence can seem exhausting and agonizing and frustrating.  But I have used reason to discover enough information to lead to my commitment to Christianity, a worldview that boasts immense evidential support and, if true, describes how meaning transcends any mental condition of mine or another person.  Just because existence feels or seems hopeless doesn't mean it is in actuality.  If you suffer from depression, especially the more debilitating kinds, I hope you find relief.  Short of that, I hope you can at least find contentment.  Do not trivialize depression--if you need help, ask!  If you can avoid at least some part of depression, why not do so?

[1].  https://thechristianrationalist.blogspot.com/2017/07/confessions-of-christian-existentialist.html