To Marry Or Not To Marry

Other than the popular misinterpretation of Ephesians 5:22-25, Paul's teachings on marriage are often ignored or trivialized.  There is more to his comments on marriage than merely the parts that are distorted by complementarians!  After all, there is much that must be said about the topic of marriage, which Paul addresses in 1 Corinthians 7.  Having already clarified that mutuality must govern marital relationships (1 Corinthians 7:3-5), he proceeds to write on whether or not people should even get married to begin with.

The fact that he advises unmarried people to keep their status can be confusing for some, given how highly the Bible regards marriage.  However, in 1 Corinthians 7:25, Paul explicitly clarifies that he is largely not elaborating on divine commands, but on personal preference.  It follows that he is neither denouncing marriage nor denouncing singleness.  Instead, he is merely emphasizing that commitment to God is more important than one's marital status and that individual decisions about marriage should thus be regarded in that light.  A single person might have more energy to direct towards spiritual development (1 Corinthians 7:32-34), but there is no reason to avoid marriage when circumstances call for it (1 Corinthians 7:36-37).

It takes only several moments to logically prove that both spiritual maturity and the desire for marriage vary from one person to the next, so there is no universal eagerness to be single or married.  Furthermore, the depth of a person's commitment to God has no inherent connection to their marital status.  Each person considering marriage needs to appraise their standing as an individual first and foremost.  For some people, especially considering how the evangelical church tends to treat marriage as a necessity, marrying is not ideal for their spiritual health, but there is no need for alarm in the case of others.  Some of Paul's comments on the matter can only be valid as a form of hyperbole emphasizing that marriage could distract some people from serving God.

To take Paul to mean that marriage should be discouraged or that single people are more righteous than married people is to distort the actual contents of 1 Corinthians 7.  Some people might be more spiritually fit for marriage than singleness, just as some people might be more spiritually fit for singleness than marriage.  Depending on the context of a person's life, there could be significant spiritual, emotional, economic, and existential benefits to either status.  The fact that Paul specifically encourages some people to get married, stay married, or stay single easily demonstrates that he is not condemning any of these options in themselves.

As Paul himself admits, there is nothing Biblically sinful about either marrying or remaining single (1 Corinthians 7:28).  Instead of generally pressuring people to automatically choose one option or the other, Christians should be among the first to realize that a person's decision to marry or not should be made based on a careful examination of the respective circumstances that a given man or woman is in.  Any other approach is neither helpful nor valid.  It is best for some people to stay single, and it is best for some people to get married.  Paul never says anything that denies either of these facts.