Despite the title of this post, what I will say here about dating applies to marriage, and vice versa, but since dating precedes marriage in many western romantic relationships I have emphasized dating. Some confusion, perhaps as a result of conflicting desires, might come about from a Christian considering a non-Christian dating partner, or a non-Christian spouse. The matter is not rationally or Biblically controversial, however. The solution is not difficult to deduce.
1 Corinthians 7:39 explicitly says that a Christian woman whose husband has died can "marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord." This is a direct command for Christians to not marry those not committed to Christianity. And if it is wrong to marry a non-Christian, then it follows that knowingly dating a non-Christian and entertaining thoughts or desires of a marital relationship with him or her is asinine, unproductive, and sinful. While a command of the Bible, if the Bible is true, is obligatory whether or not someone wants it to be, there are very obvious consequences that could result from a Christian not abiding by this prescription.
It's entirely stupid, as brief reflection reveals, for someone to date or marry someone with a drastically different worldview and either expect the difference in values and frameworks to not hinder the relationship or think that such differences don't have any metaphysical significance. A legion of relationship problems could easily result from this, but there is an issue far greater than possibly fostering gratuitous frustration with one's partner.
For a Christian to date a non-Christian--or for a rationalist to date a non-rationalist, and so on--he or she must have a greater concern for a subjective sense of fulfillment than for knowing and living in accordance with reality. Show me a Christian who dates non-Christians (and many Christians I've met are certainly not intelligent, consistent, or deep) and you will show me someone who has priorities that contradict the very document Christianity is centered on. This kind of dating is an external act of hypocrisy and irrationality. It reveals superficiality, lack of commitment, and a mind that is either divided or deluded. And if someone has an inconsistent allegiance to Christianity, there is no reason to think that he or she will not be inconsistent in other ways. A disordered lifestyle can bring about more disorder.
Simply being a Christian does not make one an ideal romantic companion, I must add, much less a worthy one. Many who identify as Christians, whether they are or not in actuality, believe many asinine, false things about the Bible and about reality in general. Only a Christian with a right worldview--and this goes far beyond simply "believing in" Jesus or claiming to love him--is worthy of the romantic commitment of another Christian with a right worldview. Some who eagerly praise Jesus have no fucking idea what the Bible does and doesn't teach about ethics, metaphysics, and epistemology, much less which truth claims are and aren't rational independent of the Bible. Accurate comprehension, thorough consistency, and intentional self-education are all mandatory for living out a commitment to Christ and the Christian worldview as a whole. Loving Jesus involves actually obeying his commands (John 14:15), and knowing the commands of him and Yahweh requires far more than fluffiness and emotion; it takes more effort than some might imagine.
A Christian who properly cares about God and reality, truth and reason, and righteousness and justice more than a desire for romantic companionship will not settle for a lesser, weaker, irrational Christian. Simply being saved doesn't make you a good dating or marriage prospect. Simply being saved doesn't mean that you know how you should live. Simply being saved doesn't mean that you have any basis for believing what you do, much less a basis that is verifiable, sound, and true.
Simply being saved is a necessary but utterly incomplete criterion for being a worthy Christian dating partner or spouse.
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