Why Fight In A Romantic Relationship?

The only legitimate reason to fight in a romantic relationship is if a spouse or dating partner refuses to give up a false or assumed belief, which could be expressed in abusive behaviors, or, in other words, something that defies reason, morality, or other things that reduce down to a matter of one or both.  If a partner is an irrational, egoistic, unjust person, only a fool would date them beyond a relatively brief testing phase anyway unless they were to change, and only a likewise irrational or tolerant (which is just a specific expression of irrationality) person would marry them.  If a partner suddenly reveals these tendencies well into a dating relationship or marriage, then there is a basis and a need to address the problem.

One might hear others say that fighting with a significant other over other things is attractive, helpful, or in some way productive.  Sometimes it is because of the pathetic emotionalism of jealousy over their partner finds someone else sexy, or it might be over assumptions they have made about their significant other.  Perhaps someone assumed that a statement made in exhaustion was made in malice or insensitivity, thinking that the presence of irrational conflict must then be necessary because it stirs up strong feelings and leads the couple to talk to each other.  Possessiveness, slander, all assumptions, and every other form of irrationality are utterly erroneous and baseless in spite of how subjectively exciting some might find them.

Conflict for the sake of conflict is asinine.  Just as peace for the sake of peace is asinine, only conflict or peace rooted in truth could possibly matter.  A rationalist, including a Christian rationalist, might have the resolve to not flee from conflict even as he or she does not gratuitously spark it, but it is intrinsically idiotic to argue/fight with a romantic partner when there is no error of an intellectual or moral kind to point out.  That some people say they actively hope to randomly, periodically fight with their significant other just to feel alive or invested in the relationship means they are too delusional to care about reality instead of their own meaningless desires.  To feel empowered, they think they must object to things that could not deserve objection and thus purposefully put strife into their dating or marriage.

Romantic relationships can be enjoyed in the fullest unity, mutuality, and kindness that the human inability to perceive other minds allows for.  However, this can only be achieved if both parties are total rationalists and are aligned with the right values.  Since it is irrational and needlessly harmful to fight just to fight, as some invalidly believe is "healthy" or "necessary," such things are contrary not only to reason, but also to the pragmatic success and smoothness of a romantic relationship.  Dating and marriage are nowhere near as difficult as many people seem to think.  All conflict from within the relationship, except for the necessary confrontation and condemnation if unrepentant irrationality surfaces, is inevitably avoidable or folly.